Why We Feel Different in November

Every November there is a shift in me that I can’t ignore. It’s subtle but steady. I slow down. I notice what is going on inside me instead of rushing through it. My energy moves into a different rhythm and suddenly the things I brushed off all year start trying to get my attention. I used to push against this. I stayed busy or distracted. I avoided anything that felt uncomfortable and convinced myself that slowing down meant something was wrong with me. Really, I just did not want to sit with myself. The quiet. The honesty. The possibility that something I had been avoiding might surface. Fighting it never helped. It only made me feel more disconnected from myself.

Eventually I stopped treating this season as something to avoid and started seeing it as an invitation. Not an invitation to heal every wound I have ever carried or sit in deep reflection every night. More like a gentle nudge to pay attention. The darker months make things clearer in a way the sun filled ones don’t. When life eases up and the world quiets, your inner world has more room to speak. Old thoughts rise. Patterns you thought were done tug at you again. You notice tension in your shoulders you did not even know was there. You remember a conversation that has been sitting in your chest for weeks. Even the smallest things show up wanting space.

But working with the darkness does not mean turning winter into a personal transformation project. I am a mom, a wife, a human. Some days I am reflective and open. Other days I am on the couch eating snacks and watching Stranger Things with zero interest in exploring my inner world. Both days count. This season is not about intensity. It is about honesty, pacing and letting yourself listen without pushing for something profound.

These days I work with the darkness in simple ways. When something keeps repeating I give it space. I don’t dig for deeper meaning. I just let it be seen. I follow my energy instead of forcing emotional depth when I don’t have the capacity. I let myself slow down which usually looks like earlier bedtimes, slower mornings and letting myself enjoy simple comforts without guilt. When something feels tender I sit beside it rather than climbing inside it. And I trust the small cues my intuition uses to speak. The nudges. The body sensations. The clarity that arrives in ordinary moments. Those pieces become easier to hear in this season.

If you are feeling this same pull inward, here are a few ways to work with the darkness:

1. Pay attention to what repeats

When something circles back more than once it usually wants to be seen. This might look like a memory showing up while you are washing dishes, thinking about a specific relationship for no obvious reason, a feeling that keeps tugging at your chest or a truth you keep pushing away. You do not need to solve it. Start with acknowledging it. If it needs more, it will keep nudging you.

2. Create small moments of quiet

You do not need a ritual or a separate practice. This is about giving your mind space to breathe so your intuition can get a word in. Sit in the car for two minutes before going inside. Wrap your hands around a warm mug and pause before you start the day. Lie on your bed for a moment before you start scrolling. Take a slightly longer shower. These tiny pauses open the kind of space where clarity slips through.

3. Let your energy set the pace

There is no badge for doing the most inner work. Some days you might be open and curious. Other days you might have nothing left in the tank. Both are normal. Let it look like giving something thirty seconds of attention, then moving on because that is all you have. Or putting something aside because you know you will come back when you have more capacity. Or having clarity drop in while you fold laundry because your mind finally relaxed enough.

4. Support your nervous system so inner work feels easier

Your body needs to feel supported for introspection to feel manageable. Warm drinks, soft lighting, familiar playlists, cozy blankets, simple scents or even creating a little corner that feels calm can shift everything. These are not luxuries. They are physiological support. Your inner world feels less threatening when your body feels held.

5. Do not force meaning

Not everything that comes up needs to be a lesson. Sometimes something rises because you finally have space for it and that is enough. You might notice that a moment from months ago still holds emotion. Or realise you have outgrown something but are not ready to act on it. Or feel sadness, frustration or nostalgia without needing to turn it into a story. Meaning tends to show up naturally when you stop chasing it.

This season is not here to overwhelm you or make you question whether you are doing enough inner work. It is here to give you space to hear yourself again. The darkness is not empty. It is quiet, honest and full of the insights you miss when life is loud. When the seasons shift again you will not come out as a brand new person. You will come out more connected to yourself because you listened in your own timing and in your own way. And that is more than enough.

Thanks for reading,

Sam

If you like this post, pin it to Pinterest!